Given that shes already on record as not wanting to participate and the boss reaction, this might be the first time I would ever consider advising someone to just no-call no-show and eat the occurrence. This is almost enough to make me start using makeup on a regular basis! They were upfront about wanting to meet everyones needs, and they made it very easy to select different options, such as being provided material to review on their own time or in private, write-ups vs videos, or just the option to opt out completely. I hope the party goes well; perhaps we could catch up on another day/ perhaps I could buy you a drink to make it up to you? We dont need to be afraid, we need to be prepared. The active shooter training was a short part of the overall agenda. None of these excuses should be used regularly, because inevitably the second you say you need time off for dental work because you have a job interview, you then also need time off for dental work. Joking about the shooter choosing another target is horrifically awful. It sounds like they just decided to do an active shooter drill. Perhaps it is the most powerful excuse and totally legit, but just imagine how lame you sound when your . Like what was really scary about the drill at the time was the impression that if it did happen, not only would we be dead, but worse than that it would be our own (collective) faults. The hangover excuse is a bit of a gamble anddepends entirely on your relationship with the friend. The babysitter just called and told me she c. nt make it today Thats all you need to say to them. The next year they just showed a video, called Run, Hide, Fight. We started calling it Run, Hide, Die as a joke, if only because if we didnt laugh at it we would all have gone insane. But I like this teachers perspective that it helps her to ensure her class is ready to allow her to concentrate on the best response to an actual emergency; so I assume emergency responders have the same belief. Also, your boss is a horses ass. Doesnt matter that the only reason that day is the only day available is because you told the office to schedule it only on that day. Otherwise, there is no harm in considering. All The Hidden Clues In Squid Game That Pointed To That Twist Ending I wanted to go to school and cared about awards. A side hustle is any job that you do in addition to your normal or main source of income. 1sg I disagree with college as a priority, it is an enhancement, your co/xo have been in the world long enough and know how to balance drill and school, that comes with maturity, what we are dealing with are the new generation, no concept of time management, putting things off until the last minute, I managed to get my diploma, attend drills and raise a family, it takes sacrifice, but that's me. Sometimes the messages are after the fact, to let us know that the school was on lockdown, but everything is ok now. Guessing they will breakout into groups and tour the building to find safe places to hide or ways to block paths. A headache isntsevere enough to render you useless for a long period of time but its bad enough that itll get you out of a social engagement. Most employee admit that they gossip at work and it is part of our human nature to gossip. Its extra depressing and pointless when the core training package for a UK-based company with US offices includes active shooter modules. The babysitter just called and told me she couldnt make it today Thats all you need to say to them. Call in sick, OP. Bring your creative projects to life with ready-to-use design assets from independent creators around the world. My Dad was a St. John Ambulance volunteer when he was younger, and was a casualty in drills more than once. Follow Alisons advice to talk to someone above her. Privacy Policy and Affiliate Disclosures, we werent told our active shooter drill was just a drill, coworker uses our guest office as her personal phone booth,, our office showed a disturbing safety video, am I a mentor now, and more, asking job candidates to go scent-free, baggy clothes at work, and more, my entry-level employee gave me a bunch of off-base criticism, my manager and coworker are secretly dating, boss will never give exceeds expectations because he has high standards, and more, update: I supervise a manager who falsified an employee write-up but I dont think she should be fired, stolen sandwiches, disgusting fridges, dish-washing drama: lets talk about office kitchen mayhem, interviewer scolded me for my outfit, job requires an oath of allegiance, and more, update: a DNA test revealed the CEO is my half brother and hes freaking out. Then in my senior year of high school, we all got herded a couple of times out to the track, because apparently someone had called in bomb threats. And if we get it wrong, we will talk out ways to stay quiet and not fidget after. Telling David a massive no straight to his face will come across as rude and will likely hurt his feelings in the process. From my recollection, they never talk about peoples legit reactions in the moment. Burying your head in the sand wont change reality. Ill come out again soon when Im in a better place. This. It was a tough meeting. Without fail, some jackass tells me how terrible I look. Something tells me the response on the other end of the phone wont be get well soon.. And where the training is done by people who are professionals *in the topic they are training*. You're going to an important family event 2. Lets Deal With Quiet Firing In The Workplace, 8 Signs of Quiet Firing You Should Know Now, 10 Good Excuses for Not Working on Weekends, 1. It really hit home how different of a world these kids are in even from the one we were in. Hey [Name], I wouldve loved to have gone out tonight but Im currently. I suppose on some level I feel like, there is nothing I can do to prevent it if its going to happen, and I dont have the reflexes that drilling would train into me to be assessing or thinking about what I might do if it did. Even seasoned writers need a helping hand at times, thats why we trust Grammarly Premium. Soldiers who are problems are not put out the correct way because the paperwork takes to long. Maybe there are social consequences to that, I dont have enough context, but they wont be more severe than triggering yourself to this extent. Three cups of black coffee and a gas station burrito will do the trick, too. This excuse is exclusively for ladies and its fantastic because nobody asks questions. If you have one disgruntled employee in your midst, that person now knows there will be a seven-hour interval in which everyone will be expecting what they think is a simulation of gun violence. Do they work in a higher-risk area or industry? I wouldnt be able to participate in one of these drills either and I HATE that they exist. Its not that he cant understand. For more information, please see our Earnings Disclosure. When I voiced my concerns, he made a few jokes about how he would simply redirect the shooter to a younger person, then asked if I was saying I wouldnt be able to take it. Absolutely nothing about this is funny to me, and this made me feel even more alienated. Read More 9 Best Practices for Career Success in Your 20s, no.7 get you PromotedContinue. Jonathan Sandahl Former Private First Class at US Army National Guard (1996-2002) Author has 503 answers and 4.3M answer views 4 y Depending on the circumstances, yes. Scripts & Templates for Lifes Uncomfortable Conversations. So, emotions were really high the week following. Amazing- they hire someone to assess risk, then ignore what they have to say about risk to staff in the lobby. And what happens, sir, when the commander isn't interested in working with the Soldier to deconflict? The drill was ultimately canceled after my employers legal counsel also reviewed the release and advised that an employer should not be asking employees to sign it. Hey really curious, since I am in a tangentially related field; is the same true for fire drills, earthquake drills, etc. have to leave your house if they say yes. * I am at a loss as to how any sort of effective drill could possibly take that long. You can approach the second-in-command, if you believe that person will be more receptive than your boss. Nowyou dont have a spare tire,and you are afraid that the mechanic workshop maybe closing. /lolsob/. This! When I was at college I had a job at a fast food kiosk in a railway station. She realized after they should not have made those jokes where I could hear them (though I understand you sometimes need dark humor to deflect your own discomfort). The whole experience just changed the entire trajectory of their career and also the field of emergency preparedness. 1 When Something Comes Up & You Still Want To See Them Shutterstock "Hey, I'm so sorry, but something came up tonight and I. This is a good perspective I can take to my leadership to let them know that while SOME of our employees might want this, it could also be detrimental to others. My school responded with were going to ring the fire alarm at X time, dont go outside, its too cold and this is ridiculous anyway. Thankfully it was a cold winter and after a few temperature reports to whoever mandated it and a lot of angry parents (especially at other schools who did make kids stand outside on a day that was probably -10F), that stopped. My civilian job has a mandatory work conference from Aug 2-5. (Unless maybe it was kitty snuggling trainingmight be up for 7 hours of that.). Teasing you and demanding you attend is NOT appropriate, no matter their age. What a jerk. I would absolutely call in sick. We should be ashamed that we are teaching children to be prepared for violence, and to be prepared to commit violence from the time they are toddlers on. Im gobsmacked. This is considered a valid excuse and your commander should work with you to find an alternate solution . It also can depend on what training is going on. What I really want is to skip it entirely but if I can, how do I explain this request/decision to my boss without disclosing my mental health struggles, explaining (in vain) the anxiety I feel about this training, or looking like the only person not tough enough to participate (as the only woman in my department)? Sometimes I go through that employee if I really want to raise an issue, but I cant always count on their support. My civilian job is very accommodating to me for any of my needs. Call in sick. Career success is just inches from your hands. Are you getting a lot of spam which is very annoying and want to avoid them? To use this excuse, you need to make a story of how awful that. This knife-edge behavior, scared enough to schedule drills, not scared enough to take it seriously it has to stop. If youre a party person, in your teens or early twenties, a party at Davids is news that will stir a lot of excitement. So boss will sacrifice OP to save himself. Ugh, so sorry OP this is a terrible idea on your companys part. So, maybe next time? Could we catch up at a less hectic week? Both my former Commander and XO attended both drill AND law school. That sounds much more similar to fire drills and tornado drills which can still be scary for kids (I was definitely the kid crying while hunched like a turtle in the hallway of my elementary school a few times) but are generally not long-term traumatic. I totally get the desensitisation though; Its a self-preservation measure. I cant imagine how traumatizing a full day of that stuff, in person, would be. Im so grateful to live in a country where this isnt a thing. Law enforcement starts working together on active shooter drillsmy organization does not add training. This whole topic is not funny in the least, but I have to admit I snort-laughed when I read about that factory worker. That is egregious and worth taking seriously imo. I already know how to do nothing. You were asked to attenda raging, booze-filled pub crawlon Friday? I had to listen to 911 calls, crying children, the lot. The messaging was very much this is the best way to keep you from getting killed, take your own life into your hands and fight back! And its like, well, given the current gun laws, yes, this is my best option but it felt insulting to be told this. I had been there. Endless sympathy to you, OP. - From a Soldier perspective. Im a little bit too old to really be a member of the school-shooting-generation (in that I was in undergrad by the time Sandy Hook happened), and my impression when I hear my younger peers talking about it (and from some commenters in threads below) is that the pervasiveness (of both the drills and the threat) is what makes them so traumatizing for many people. I mean your boss sounds delightful so maybe he is concerned he may be a target, but the chances of you ever needing to use that mass-shooting situation at work is low. Training taken out of orientation, alert system stays. Go somewherea hike, a spa, a museumon that day. When my coworkers started joking about it, I told them if they kept it up, Id go to HR. training like that. Please save yourself from living through a trauma unnecessarily. And then, afterwards, we got the WORST LECTURE EVER from a crying teacher telling us that if this was real wed all be dead because of our collective inability to JUST BEHAVE OURSELVES and BE QUIET for half an hour. Honestly, the boss Im going to take her word for it that hes a nice guy, but hes clearly demonstrated that as far as hes concerned, failing to participate is just going to be a sign that shes everything he probably secretly believes about women and Gen Z. **Large scale mass shooting at organization. OP call in sick if your boss continues to be a jerk about this. 1. I was forced to go through an active-shooter training despite protests, and when a group of us were able to push back as a group, I used the word consent a lot. Generally youre not asked to disclose why youre opting out. Boost your business with the right images. If something comes up that requires your immediate attention (such as a death in the family), this is considered a valid excuse for missing drill. You Were in a Car Accident 8. The timeline itself would be enough for me to push back. Im so sorry and I hope that things can change, because this is so cruel and unfair to OP, to the kids, to you, to everyone. Every person is different, and in the LW case I would agree she has done active shooter drills, so her choice to do something to avoid and additional drill of this type (talk to mgmt or call sick, I have my opinion but irrelevant to her choice). Even though I knew exactly what was happening, my hands were shaking so much that I couldnt lock my door. its kind of a variant on calling in sick but honestly, recruiting a trusted accomplice is what i would do. Oh my god. Im so sorry youre in this position, OP. I think Alisons advice is really good. Its gone on far too long, we need real societal changes, not bandaid drills. Just reading the stories in this letter and in the comments has given me nausea. Im so sorry. According to the US Department of Labor, Employment and Training Administration, approximately 44% of people in postsecondary education are adults over the age of 24. Intruding boss never asked detailed questions again. Im very sorry. Hes a nice person but has very deeply entrenched ideas about mental health, anxiety, young people, and triggers, and I dont want to have to disclose my own mental health diagnoses to him, make him think Im simply not tough enough to handle it, or come across like a millennial snowflake, etc. People in hiding should expect to be there for hours. Its always on the government to do something, never on the 99% to effect change by living up to their rebel ancestors they sure do love bragging about. I know I would. LW, your boss has shown you who he really is. Im going to put out there that people often laugh in situations like this to diffuse discomfort and emotionally distance themselves from the situation. Yup. I doubt random company is coordinating with outside agencies. Asking the host for a favor right before they are, holding a party is going to result in your favor. The answer is maybe. Below you'll find way to get out of a date, based on your situation. Here are some reasons why employees quiet quit at work? You need to see that your fear is that a single instance will make you one of the people he isnt nice to, and that is terrifying. they understand that all you need to do is stay in bed (and watch a movie you just bought). The one I attended was for an outbreak of Avian Flu. My high school teachers kept hammers and baseball bats in the classrooms and told us where they were when we did ALICE days. Communicate early and often with both your NG chain of command and also with your college professors. asthma? You are needed for babysitting 9. Active shooter drills and lockdown drills are one of the few that my kids take seriously. Unfortunately I really doubt the boss is going to be at all receptive to having his eyes open, just based on the description of him. When you miss nine drill weekends in 12 months without contacting your commander or the Navy Operational Support Center to which you report, your commanding officer can declare your . This was not that, its just callous. The light up shoes remind me of the fact that it regularly comes up in online forums for parents of kids with diabetes that you cant turn off some of the blood sugar monitor and insulin pump audible alarms, due to FDA regulations. If approved, you will be given permission to miss the drill and will not face any penalties. Just be careful not to cough or sneeze or they could actually suggest a hospital visit. I also doesn't hurt that our founder has a little store on there Donating to Never the Right Word willhelp us produce more free content. If you feel you need to address it with your boss directly, you could do that while being vague. Last time, it was 7 AM and only about 10% of the tenants evacuated. The military is their own worse enemy when it comes to this area. First responders and EM do exercises to improve our side of it. For staff, we simply review our active shooter policy at our annual inservice which mostly amounts to lock-down and hide and pray. If you know ahead of time that you wont be able to make it to drill, try to work with your units first sergeant or commander to see if theres any way you can make up the training. My current campus is in a denser urban core, and what my director has decided to do is to ask our public safety team to come in and evaluate our workspaces one-on-one rather than do some kind of generalized training that would probably be of little use. Pretty much this. Ah, I bet you live in the same city as me. Welcome to teaching in America! Survivor of gun violence here. Again, its like, well yes, I want them to have survival skills in this reality we live in. Hey [Name], sorry cant do tonight. Also, we do have accommodations for those who cant watch the video. They also handwaved off the fact that we work in a giant glass fishbowl and cant remotely lock the doors like you can with many other buildings on campus. Do this training or your insurance rate will go up.. They make you practice barricading doors. If they wouldnt let you out of a fire drill, theyd be unlikely to let you out of this, and I dont know how things would shake out with saying you need to skip important safety drills as a reasonable accommodation. Some of that context may help OP decide how they want to push back. This sometimes makes it extremely hard to complete college assignments by their due date. Apologize for not making it upto them,but you cant do anything about it? Wanted to add that I agree the real problem is in the proliferation of guns and the lawlessness favored bycertain politicians. I HATED that we had to do these trainings it felt like being given a band-aid for a hemorrhage. There is a huge possibility that they wont remember asking you later in the hustle of all the guests,and in case they do, pick up any otherexcuse from this list. smdh. So to me, everyone should have to go thru emergency drills of some sort as our part to reduce our burden on emergency responders. That's fine. Theres always That Guy who feels the need to comment. I empathize. It is a valid excuse to not attend a MUTA 6 or annual Training? And law enforcement is the last group Id trust with my safety. Yes, there are employers who know or try to get around laws meant to protect Reservists. Call in sick and deal with it later. Exactly. Theyd just experienced one in their community. This means that many people who are working full time are also studying. Someone (I think it was Maya Angelou) said that when somebody shows you who they are, you should believe them. It is never a fun conversation but it is a necessary conversation in this era of teaching. I once worked in a building owned by a community college even though my office was unaffiliated with the college, and we would go into lockdown when the rest of the community college did so.) Some of them can be a lot of fun if the team already works well together, but I dont think any of them are useful if the team dynamics are bad. how do I get out of an active-shooter drill at my office? Are they tenants in a building that is having this training for all businesses? CLICK HERE to get your copy from Book Depository. Failure to call before you miss your drill weekend or immediately thereafter is considered an unexcused absence by the military. That would be my guess too, but we cant know. How awful. william lancaster obituary; how to open aegis bait station without key; rooms for rent in trenton, nj; Hello world! Your sporting team is playing in the finals. If Rainy Day was stressed by the drill, think of how they would have felt. A text like this will save you up from any long unnecessarydetails, especially if you cant come up with any other genuine sounding excuses at that moment. So. Likenever mind the snowflakes, what about the combat veterans? Nothing can really prepare you for this. Finally we learned they had just been required to offer an active shooter training by their insurance. same, but I would leave early on the day before because of said flu/stomach bug/whatever, take off sick the day of the training, and take off the next day, too, to avoid the followup chatter around the office, and maybe mitigate some of the where were you, you missed its. I hope that, some day, no child anywhere will ever have to even think about doing something like that. TLDR: I need to do drills so emergency responders dont have to add dealing with me to their plate; it is my civic duty. Privacy Policy. Full stop. Law enforcement continues to train others and practice drills. Please stand firm on the accommodations that you need. We were located in an area where street violence was a significant risk. Some years back, my company was adjacent to an active-shooter event it happened at another organization that rented space in the same building. Then you can avoid the worst of the after-event commentary. Yes, absolutely, get a doctors note so you have backup. A person can seem nice on the surface without actually being a truly caring and empathetic person. As a result of that experience and the PTSD that it caused, my elder kid takes a sick day any time there is an event or training or other triggering occurrence at work. Training as part of orientation. Hes a nice person but has very deeply entrenched ideas about mental health, anxiety, young people, and triggers, and I dont want to have to disclose my own mental health diagnoses to him, make him think Im simply not tough enough to handle it, or come across like a millennial snowflake, etc.. I was voluntold to participate in my companys active shooter drills and I said straight out NO. But that was just about 30 minutes, not anything we had to actually do. Most workplace active shooters are targeted. With 58th BfSB, it looks like i only have one drill in conflict with this semester. how do you handle soldiers and college? Absolutely unnecessary. Same with mine; customized by law enforcement but the only customization was Oh yeah all your doors are glass so hiding isnt an option! The whole realistic reenactment thing makes people in charge feel like theyre doing more than they are. (And imo no child should be doing in-depth active shooter training beyond heres the exit route, heres how to lock the door, but Im not a parent and I know this stuff is tough.). One time my office decided to do an escape room as a team bonding exercise. Im 38 now and I still think about that day with anxiety and sadness. But in terms of living vs. surviving, it doesnt affect me at all in the way LW described. Its almost perfect. :D, https://www.fox4news.com/news/officer-shot-during-active-shooter-training-forest-hill, https://www.kios.org/news/2022-08-25/arrest-follows-active-shooter-drill-gone-wrong, https://www.securityinfowatch.com/healthcare/news/21277863/three-more-nurses-sue-adventhealth-over-faked-active-shooting. Our active shooter training is online, so you can just play the video and ignore it & still get credit. Theyll probably be asking if youre okay the second they see you. There is no value in a seven hour training for something that would last from 5-30 minutes, realistically. And if you are not looking up for one, have a detailed conversation with him. Im so sick and tired of people acting like theres no way to stop the shootings and we all have to just learn how to not die when they happen. The drill was short, and we knew it was coming. Either, they will be worried, or angry, or blatantly say 'no' to your suggestions of going away. Elegant Themes have been building the world's most popular WordPress themes for the past 10 years, and rest assured their products will always be improved and maintained. I had a med student with me and I took her into my office afterwards to check in. Some people either dont want any gun laws modified as they think that is the start of taking away all gun rights and also now there is such hatred for the political partyso their representatives vote against it. I dont need to sit through seven hours of that garbageagain. It ruined my entire week-end. So. I was when I first went to this unit 5.5 years ago. 4. But we do talk about it at home. Laughing about that is wrong on so many levels, regardless of whether youre in hearing distance of someone or not. Law enforcement response was more organized and confronts shooter relatively quickly. I remember going to a 4th of July party thrown by a combat veteran friend-of-a-friend. It will not be possible for me to participate.. Author By Posted on June 8, 2022 Categories elle lively mcbroom age 2021 how to check engine hours on suzuki outboard. It could also make the shooter more effective because it could very well be an employee in this training that becomes the shooter. Im sorry, but its an all-day event? Afterwards, I refused to go down there alone again, and thankfully none of my shift supervisors gave me a hard time about that. Basically it was a whole thing staged as if some classmates had gotten in a car with a drunk driver and died, involving the local law enforcement, paramedics, etc., and framed as if it was actually happening and not a drill. My kid is still dealing with PTSD as a result of that incident, as are a significant number of their colleagues who were also present that day. This individual lived through a civil war in their country of origin and understandably was not keen on the idea of triggering difficult memories in a professional setting. He may appear to be superficially nice but he is not kind. The storeroom was in the basement, where the ceiling was low enough for me to reach without standing on tiptoe. Editor-in-Chief & Career Development Expert. I would not talk to your boss in your shoes. Is that the one that takes place in a bar? Even ignoring personal history, seven hours is enough to upset anyone! I am having a hard time seeing why this is even necessary for a company so small it doesnt have HR. If you have a doctor's note stating that you are too ill to participate in drill, this is a valid excuse. See if you can ask around about who started this training idea. A chemical material handler from HAZWOPER? Its not as full on as what the OP saying, theres no law enforcement or reenactment. To enhance the dramatic effect, you can fill up your voice with tears and can have a catharsis you were longing for. Save yourself the heartache and the stress. I think Im about same age as you. Your sweet, naive brain thought it was a good idea to make plans to fill every second. Im usually okay with this kind of dark humor; but not in this case of a very real and traumatizing event. Even so, the vast majority of cops who do carry spend their whole career without firing a shot except on the range. I dont see whats gained by including all the waiting/hiding time. It isnt helpful. They're basically faster, safer, and more supportive- you can check them out here. Now, chill and relax. this situation is hard enough without your boss being insensitive. When someone says, "We should get brunch this weekend" respond with "I love brunch!" This way you have successfully. I vote to call in sick. You dont need her permission to Nope out of the next one. A few months later, my school staged this surprise mock car accident to discourage people from drinking and driving. The problem is you have random, unqualified people thinking they can provide effective active shooter information when thats clearly not the case. Yup I was going to do this pre-pandemic to get out of a (much more minor) mandatory fun activity that happened to involve one of my anxiety triggers because I knew trying to explain why something most people think is at worst annoying makes me shake with nerves was just not worth spending political capital on.