I'm Indian who's seen enough Indian dudes shower their mothers and sisters with adoration and treat their girlfriend/fiances/wives coldly. my boyfriend ignores me when his sister is around I think you have to decide what youre willing to put up with a relationship. Try to get things right and, if you can, you can say you tried, saw he was a freak or wasn't ready for a relationship and move on. We get crazy and silly together, have a ton of inside jokes and probably shut others out without meaning to. There are some suggestions here on how to talk to him that arent accusatory. There are an unlimited amount of possibilities but here are the most common. Ask him if he's embarrassed by anything about you, and tell him that it sometimes makes you feel upset when he doesn't pay attention to you when you're around his friends. So you think it's totally normal to invite the same person on every date you go on with your partner. I think your feelings are valid and I would feel the same. Explain to him what could be done to make you feel better about the situation. If you want to save your relationship, this is the last thing you need. I dont think youre being too insensitive or insecure. Just be sure to keep an eye out for classic withdrawing behavior. Now, before say anything, hear me out. I hear you, but I just think getting hurt by jokes about your skills during video games calls for communication rather than breaking up. Ignoring somebody is usually a way of dodging a situation, or a punishment of some sort. Good luck, OP. A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. Use more I's and less yous. I know your boyfriend can sometimes be a real piece of work, and I feel you. Cuz if u do, I got bad news for u You aren't being insensitive or insecure, your feelings are incredibly valid. If youve been arguing he may also be ignoring you as a way of trying to avoid any further conflict. I think its way over exaggerating to say this isn't "healthy". Y'all weird. He might have some legit points to note, or you might understand it is time to move on! One of the best ways to get his attention when he ignores you is to get on with your own life in the meantime. I wanted to feel like I was a priority in my relationship with him. Just a thought. He sounds very set in his ways, even if you do address the issue with him. That way, he won't feel everything is his fault, even if it might be. Bubs, I totally get you. I don't know if this is a problem you can fix. Its a bond that cant be broken. You might find that your boyfriend ignores you after an argument or when he's mad at you. Now there is a possibility that your boyfriend really is ignoring you. I realize not everyone is quick with a comeback or has that kind of sense of humor butagain, communication. By directly addressing the issue you might be able to nip it in the bud and quickly get to the bottom of things without allowing it to roll on. Never give an ultimatum. 9 Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Is Ignoring You and What to - PairedLife There isn't any guarantee that you will be on his side forever but his sister will. Relationships are never going to be plain sailing all the time. There are people who love unconditionally to their family especially sisters and I'm sure your bf is amongst them. Time alone, teach you how to play game, etc.). You're not alone. What you have explained is some weird behaviour coming from your boyfriend. If your boyfriend ignores you around his family then he definitely has no plans to include you among his most important people. If he is feeling angry and frustrated ignoring you is his way of non-verbally showing you that your actions or words were unacceptable to him. Better to ditch him. I dont feel like I get to spend quality time alone with you. I don't think you really have a problem with him being nicer to her. And I'm muting this anyway because I know you'll just continue to insult me out of nowhere. When you try its more likely to come across as undignified, desperate, and needy. Maybe he thinks you're too into him and doesn't want to show it off in front of his buds, or maybe he's worried that you won't fit in with them. my boyfriend ignores me when his sister is around Take care and good fortunes to you. 9 Reasons Your Boyfriend Ignores You And 4 Things You Can Do She probably doesnt have any siblings and doesnt understand the relationship between siblings and thats ok. She needs to communicate with him and then he will have to dump her because no matter what he does she will never let this go. Get yourself out of there and find somebody worth you. Find your voice to voice your wants and opinions. Your boyfriend might not even realize this is happening, but when he's around his friends, it can be more intense for him than it is for anyone else, and he needs quiet time afterward to recover. Hi everyone! If it upsets her, then it's not caring. It's natural to feel hurt when your boyfriend clams up and ignores you in front of his friends. I don't think this is something to break up with him over, especially if you really like him. I would talk to him of you love him, but to be honest I think he is the type of person who is always going to put her first. ), This reminds me of one of my exes, who was very close to his mother and sister. I couldn't believe he was going to surprise me with a gift because he never did before, and I thought it was so thoughtful because I hadn't bought a yoga mat yet. What you can do about this is think about how you act and dress around his friends, and ask yourself whether or not it might be embarrassing for him. You're jealous of his bond with his sister & that makes you insecure. They wouldnt tag along with us physically, but anytime we had a disagreement over something he would bring up their opinion on our argument and specifically my argument to discredit me. He's not ignoring you. Maybe she's too lonely and your boyfriends try to make her sister feels less lonely and is afraid that she feels forgotten now that he has you. He should be treating the sister like he is treating g/f and the g/f like he is treating the sister. If your boyfriend isnt able to go out without his sister even when you request this its time to have a conversation and be prepared to walk away. Avoid texting him too much and making him upset. But he makes hardly any effort to include her and keeps calling his sister to their own outings. This is going to tell you straight away whether something is up. I get that siblings get along and that's nice, it's lovely that they get on so well. But if they're dating for 6 months-1 year or more and this kept going on, girl, what are you doing that you didn't have this talk with your guy?? window.__mirage2 = {petok:"aiYjkl1grl3AEyno8k_l..mJXrjujwGZt__mUjXlvWc-1800-0"}; The material on this site may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, cached or otherwise used, except as expressly permitted in writing by Brown Brothers Media Pte. Think of your happiness because his attention is more towards his sister and thats weird. my boyfriend ignores me when his sister is around If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. He sounds like a really cool big brother imo. What was that commenter even THINKING? Communicate! Remember that. It's weird to invite your sibling on every date you go with your SO. Relationship conflict is very rarely exclusively one persons fault. Hes not a child and she deserves better. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 at 800-799-7233, or you can message with someone by texting START to 88788. There are many possible reasons but this is not an easy detail to diagnose. 2023 RelationshipExplained. Its a bit weird and you probably cant change the dynamic. Texting can quickly create misunderstandings. It was one of the signs that I didn't notice. When he does get married I imagine he would put his family first. Yes, it applies to certain circumstances, but NOT all! Every single time we go out, he asks his sister if she wants to come. The perfect partnership isnt one thats conflict-free, its one that talks about solutions. Youre quiet young so lots of time to find someone who is actually nice to you. That's fine I did my best to let him know I was there for him and that if . Maybe theyre waiting for you to choose your role in their world. Do you really want to be with someone who prioritizes their sister over you? I think it's time to go guy shopping. Sounds like your competing with his sister in your head. Youre not a bad person for wanting to be equally having fun and respect. Move on. Lets be honest, its a pretty natural feeling when one sees that the one they love so close to somebody else be it that person is there sibling. Manage Settings I cannot imagine anyone saying this is "normal.". my boyfriend ignores me when hes with his family - reddit 3 Ways to Connect to a Sibling Who Ignores You - wikiHow He will probably tell you you are being silly if you bring this up, but the truth is that his actions are showing you that you're not as important to him as his sister. Ok as a "spoiled little sister" (now in her 30s) who didn't actually have that close relationship with my older brothers, (but I know they love me/can be overprotective) I do think you're being a little insecure in all this. Maybe he feels like you'll say something that will make his friends uncomfortable. Doesn't say a word. October 17, 2022, 2:15 pm. If you decide to stay together, then you need to set boundaries. And we're in fucking pandemic and you think its weird that he wants to be with his family?? Conversely, he might assume she would volunteer a suggestion if she had one. Don't say that you want him to treat you more like her, or that you to to spend more time with him without her, because he'll see that as an attack on her and get defensive. You deserve an apology and immediate change because you arent asking much. Be kind and mature. Your boundaries act as your own individual set of rules. This seems to weird to be true but in the event it is, tell him how you feel. But that doesn't mean it has to stay that way! You're crazy. We all know that guys will do whatever it takes to avoid drama and confrontation! I still think your boyfriends behaviour is a little bit too much with his sister though, but I dont know, people behave in all sorts of weird ways with their families! When I was with my ex, we did everything together. If he brings up that he feels nervous when you're around, then he's already had the conversation with himself, and there's no reason to worry. Her general traits are that she is flirtatious and carefree. So your boyfriend ignores you when his daughter is around. I despise my deskmate. They're still young. my boyfriend ignores me when his sister is around. I say this because after they have the talk, she will assume his sister is dead to him which will of course not happen and then theyll fight about it and thats where its gonna end. Better off building a habit of handling things like an adult; than being a child. My Girlfriend Doesn't Text Me Like She Used To (Problem Solutions). Do you have your brother over when you fuck too or??? Until then no. Why are you still in it? If this is the case, have a conversation with him about it. Here are a few things you can do if you feel like your boyfriend ignores you when his daughter is around. When my brother tagged along, we could literally stay out until the sunrise if we wanted to Perhaps the dynamics in their house is the same way? That way you leave the door open for making up, but you put the ball in his court. In this way, you can tell him that his silence makes you feel uncomfortable and ask how he feels about it. my boyfriend ignores me when his sister is around. It's almost always this way at the beginning of relationships when guys are still trying to figure out how to balance their newfound relationships with their existing ones. I've been in this relationship. But you can legit just leave this dude. Is Dancing With Someone Else Cheating? There's someone out there that will spoil you and be considerate with you AND love his family. The reality is, his daughter is the most important woman in his life. (Except weird sexual stuff. If hes defensive and combative, then dump him sis hes trash. But the reality is that often relationship conflict also requires some space. But right now it sounds like she hasn't even confronted him about it yet. Think about the good things before considering the bad and what he doesnt do. It sounds as if he has a crush on his sister, and you're the beard. For example, if he takes a long time to text you back you might tell him you start to feel paranoid when you dont hear from him and worry something is wrong. 1. Try to be independent and not clingy or needy when your boyfriend is around his friends. my boyfriend ignores me when his sister is around The next step is to really take a deep dive into why you feel like your boyfriend neglects you when he is with his daughter. This is difficult for many people to understand, especially those that are in newer relationships and are still finding their footing. my boyfriend ignores me when his sister is around . Do not botter to try. But even then there is always a limit to it. If you approach him I would do my level best to keep it close to plain old "I just want to spend time one on one with my boyfriend" and go from there.